of his success. "It's simple," Apollo told him. "It's all about
symbology. I chose the sun. I chose the one thing they cannot go
without. Now, even if they forget me, they will remember my symbol,
and will forever speak my name in their anecdotes and poetry."
YHWH was impressed by this answer, and demanded to know more.
"There really isn't much more tell, actually. That's my secret."
YHWH, unsatisfied, took leave of Apollo. The sun had burned
his face, and so he vowed never to venture so near to it again. He
decided to approach Ra, who had outsurvived most other deities by
having had his name etched in Egyptian sandstone.
When YHWH asked Ra for the secret to his success, Ra responded,
"It's quite simple. I have chosen for myself a most powerful symbol.
As the sun rose, the Egyptians thought of me. As it set, they watched
me chasing the night back to dawn."
Perturbed, YHWH ventured to ask what the eye had to with it. "The
eye," Ra retorted, "is like the sun, watching all of Egypt as it sails
overhead."
This was unacceptable for YHWH, who decided to leave Egypt, making
a personal note to plague it someday for it's contempt. He went on to
Los Angeles, where he strolled across Stage B, only to be accosted by a
bright white light beaming at his pupils. He left immediately, assuming
the great god Hollywood also used the sun as a symbol. So YHWH went home
for a bit, where he fell asleep to the crooning of Golda Meir's second
operetta.
When he awoke, he reached an epiphany. The sun had already been
used too often, and the religions using it had fallen or were falling.
YHWH decided on a different tact...he would make his symbol his SON.
That would get them. That would drive them nuts.
Unfortunately, years later, he stumbled on Ra again, only to
discover that Ra didn't get the joke. It was only funny in English.
This didn't bode well for the Greeks, but at least Hollywood could have
a real hoot and holler.
